1st Wives Club - First Wives Club

2012-01-25T11:07:00.001-08:00

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

2012-01-07T00:18:00.000-08:00

I think today is the day to start a new life! Just have to get rid of the garbage that causes my misery! Hopefully tomorrow will even be better than today!

Thought For The Day

2012-01-06T01:13:00.000-08:00

Has discovered, some people are here strictly for amusement's sake.

Divorce Court

2012-01-05T09:46:00.000-08:00

Just had to share this one comic of Divorce Court.

Thought For The Day

2012-01-05T01:08:00.000-08:00

Dear God, Please help me to remember to keep my words sweet. That way, when I have to eat them they won't be so hard to swallow. ~Me

Thought For The Day

2012-01-04T22:05:00.000-08:00

Todays Thougth For The Day:

Treat your wife like a QUEEN... and you will always be her KING.

Behind a Great Man

2011-02-09T01:24:00.000-08:00

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.
Jim Carrey

Love Quote of the Day

2011-02-08T08:15:00.001-08:00

Sometimes the heart sees what is invisible to the eye.
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

It Happens When You Are Not Looking

2010-12-23T15:22:00.000-08:00

You know the old saying you find love or meet someone when you least expect it or not really looking.

Over the past few weeks I have meet someone. It is a new adventure. I am excited at the same time reserved. I have been dating off an on over the past years since my divorce. I was beginning to think all men where cheaters, did not take care of themselves, or have all their teeth. Don't get me wrong they can have their teeth missing however, get some dentures. I have joked and started a E book on the 50 worst first dates. That is another subject.

I was learning about myself, what I wanted, needed and would not settle for. Have you heard we are like onions? When someone said that to me we have to talk about the onion I looked at them and said what? I like onions. No. she said it is about the layers of an onion and how we peel this onion.

Cleaning and eating your onion:

When you hold an onion in your hand you look at the outer lay that has to be cleaned.
This is the first step we peel of that paper skin on onions. Take a hard look at ourselves. Invest in you first

Once the paper layer is gone we look at the first layer. We reveal very few things about ourselves as we meet people. We are guarded we have to build a layer of trust. Once that layer has been reveled and stable we peel off another layer of our onion and reveal a bit more. With each layer we look ask ourselves do we like this onion and I want to continue or does it leave a nasty taste in our mouth or is it just plain rotten.

We never run into a relationship fast without reading the road map along the way or ask for directions and maintain our auto.

So back to it happens when we are not looking. In the age of PC's and internate dating I connected withsome one. Started out several weeks with emails and telephone conversations. They we decided to meet for a soda in a common public place. There was a bit fear. However, unless we take a chance we may never know what we might miss in life. Besides, what have we lost a few hours drinking a soda.

I have to say my meeting was very good. No lack of conversation for both of us. He then asked me out for the following weekend which was a good feeling. A gentleman for sure.

Our first date we had to cancel due to weather. However, it did happen. He arrived with a flower and gift for me. I was taken back on the gift it was beautiful and I was not sure how to respond. It was a charm necklace. The charms where of all the possiblites of the future. It was sweet. The date ended with great conversations and the ackward goodbye. Will he kiss me or not. Well the answer is yes he did.

I will keep you updated in Jan or Feb on the progress of this relationship. Like they say It happens when you are not looking. We shall see where this goes and the as the charm was for the future possibilites.

Life

2010-11-08T05:21:00.000-08:00

Love yourself. Those who don't love YOU should leave your life anyways. You are one of a kind, unique, beautiful. Just like fingerprints we are all different.

Three Little Words

2010-11-07T17:18:00.000-08:00

Don't you just love those three little words? Three words every woman should hear every day: "You're right, honey!"

Choices, Life and Love

2010-11-02T01:34:00.000-07:00

At some point in life, you have to stop complaining & realize that things are the way they are, because you made them that way..all by the choices you made!

Choices, Life and Love

Reason, Season or Lifetime

2010-11-01T08:12:00.000-07:00

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Thank you for being a part of my life, whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Reason, Season or Lifetime

Life and Truth

2010-10-31T01:06:00.000-07:00

If you think that seeing is believing then your wrong, because sometimes the most important things in life are things we can't see.

Truth and Life

Character

2010-10-30T07:59:00.000-07:00

Character is doing the right thing even when you don't want to!

Character and Life

Inspritional,Life, and Independence

2010-10-29T07:40:00.000-07:00

"If I cared what everyone else thought, I'd be just like everyone else, and there's already too many of them." ~ M. Rose

Inspritional,Life, and Independence

Quotes of the Day

2010-10-28T01:32:00.000-07:00

Quote of the Day:
Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there.

Mood Swings

2010-10-27T07:51:00.000-07:00

If it weren't for mood swings I'd get no exercise at all!

Mood Swings,Exercise

Wrong Mistakes

2010-10-27T07:30:00.000-07:00

It takes a single moment to realize what you did wrong and correct it.. but for some people, it takes a lifetime to admit they were ever wrong and fix it.

Life and Standards

2010-10-26T07:48:00.000-07:00

Raise your standards, choose to be with happy and supportive people. Don't let anyone belittle your dreams, they are real, fear is not.

Life Lessons, Happy, and Standards

Dreams

2010-10-25T06:42:00.000-07:00

Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you.

Dreams

Face lift

2010-10-24T08:04:00.000-07:00

Giving my smiley face icon a face-lift . Going from this ;) to this : >
I think I look younger.

Quote Of The Day

2010-10-24T01:37:00.000-07:00

Quote of The Day: Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. Margaret Thatcher

Quote of the Day, Lady, Margaret Thatcher

Dreams Life Lessons

2010-10-23T01:31:00.000-07:00

Believe in the things you want in your life, listen to your heart, and follow your dreams!!

Dreams - Life - Life Lessons- Love

Dreams, Life, Friendship, Love, Philosophy

2010-10-22T01:26:00.000-07:00

Never forget there is always someone who loves you wherever you are whatever yo do. Stay true to yourself and listen to your heart and follow your dreams.

Dreams, Life, Friendship, Love, Philosophy

Dreams

2010-10-21T06:13:00.000-07:00

Live for the now; dream of the future and don't dwell in the past.We can only influence what happens to us at this very minute so make the most of it!

Dreams, Life

Dreams

2010-10-20T06:21:00.000-07:00

What would you do if you woke up tomorrow and all your dreams came true?

Dreams - Life

Dreams and Life

2010-10-19T06:23:00.000-07:00

We represent stars in heaven. Sometimes we shine w/ the rest, sometimes we twinkle alone & sometimes when we least expect it, we make someone's dreams come true.

Dreams , Life

Honesty

2010-10-17T06:48:00.000-07:00

Honesty is the BEST policy! The truth always comes out in the end so why delay the inevitable?

Rejection

2010-10-16T06:53:00.000-07:00

...is going to trust that rejection--in any form, from anyone--is simply God's way of saying "Careful, kiddo. You were going the wrong way."

Trust, Faith, Rejection, Wisdom, Breakup

Quote For The Day

2010-10-15T06:40:00.000-07:00

Quote of the Day
Change before you have to... Jack Welch

Love and Trust

2010-10-14T06:33:00.000-07:00

Love me without fear, trust me without doubts, love me without restrictions, want me without demand and accept me for who I am.

Love and Trust

Thought For The Day

2010-10-12T06:25:00.000-07:00

Is through playing the rules of someone else's game.

Thought for the day, Love Lost, Realtionships, Hurt

Love

2010-10-11T06:24:00.000-07:00

LOVE isn't something you say, LOVE is something you show with your actions. . .don't tell me you love me then treat me the way you do! ! !

Hitting Bottom

2010-10-11T01:07:00.000-07:00

If you want somebody to learn from their mistakes...don't cushion their falls. We all need to feel rock bottom before we know we are there.

Realtionships, Hitting Bottom,Life, Love,

Realtionships

2010-10-10T01:00:00.000-07:00

They say that there is someone out there for everyone but I am still waiting for that someone. I'm beginning to think my someone got hit by a bus!

Trust and Friendship

2010-10-09T07:03:00.000-07:00

Real friendship is when you know all the horrible secrets about each other, and "IT'S OK" (:

Trust, Friendship

Trust and Love

2010-10-09T06:37:00.000-07:00

Some people come into your life and some people leave it... you just have to trust that life has a road mapped out for you.

Trust and Love

2010-10-09T06:32:00.000-07:00

I think Facebook needs a relationship status that says SINGLE AND NOT LOOKING

Quotes For The Day

2010-10-09T06:29:00.000-07:00

Men are easily replaced, with batteries!

Thought for the day

2010-10-09T06:02:00.000-07:00

If you always see the negative side of things, eventually that's all there is. Always look for the positive no matter how small.

Trust

2010-10-09T01:03:00.000-07:00

Trust is difficult to earn and it is easily lost-the trust built over a decade can be shattered in an instant by one offhanded remark or deed.

Thought for the day

2010-10-08T07:54:00.000-07:00

Good friends are like honey-they stick with you no matter what.

Thought for the day.

Letting Go

2010-10-08T06:44:00.000-07:00

Letting go & starting over is hard, you just have to release it,accept it & move on. Let God take the wheel, keep praying & have faith for better things to come.

Thought For The Day

2010-10-08T01:00:00.000-07:00

Believes any man in a relationship is OFF-LIMITS!! to other women...The MAN in the relationship should feel the same way.

Thought for the day

Quotes Of The Day

2010-10-07T07:09:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it's not about remembering or forgetting, it's about acknowledgment.

Thought For The Day

2010-10-06T07:18:00.000-07:00

Why is it that all the hot guys are jerks.. the sweet guys are ugly..and the hot sweet guys are gay???

Thought For The Day

2010-10-04T07:39:00.000-07:00

How is it you can be lonely when you are in a room with someone?

Love, Hurt and Live

2010-09-30T07:21:00.000-07:00

Live EVERYDAY as if it's the last and MAKE GOOD MEMORIES! Kiss and hug your loved ones, tell them you love them. You never know if you get that chance again!

Love, Hurt, Live, Life,

Trust and Pain

2010-09-29T07:00:00.000-07:00

Worry does not take the pain out of tomorrow; it merely takes the joy out of today, 1 Peter 5:7 Casting all your care upon her, Phil 4:6 Be anxious for nothing.
Trust and Pain

Trust

2010-09-19T06:59:00.000-07:00

Trust its a very funny thing- everyone wants you to trust them but they never want to trust you.

Trust Love Fear

2010-09-09T06:57:00.000-07:00

"Love me without fear trust me without wondering love me without restriction want me without demand accept me how I am"

Love and Hurt

2010-09-08T07:19:00.000-07:00

You can love someone with all you have, and get nothing in return and still pretend to be happy. It shouldn't be that way.

The Best Day Of My Life

2010-07-23T09:13:00.001-07:00

The Best Day Of My Life. Gregory M Lousignont

Today, when I awoke, I suddenly realized that this is the best day of my life, ever! There were times when I wondered if I would make it to today; but I did! And because I did I'm going to celebrate!

Today, I'm going to celebrate what an unbelievable life I have had so far: the accomplishments, the many blessings, and, yes, even the hardships because they have served to make me stronger.

I will go through this day with my head held high, and a happy heart. I will marvel at God's seemingly simple gifts: the morning dew, the sun, the clouds, the trees, the flowers, the birds. Today, none of these miraculous creations will escape my notice.

Today, I will share my excitement for life with other people. I'll make someone smile. I'll go out of my way to perform an unexpected act of kindness for someone I don't even know.

Today, I'll give a sincere compliment to someone who seems down. I'll tell a child how special he is, and I'll tell someone I love just how deeply I care for her and how much she means to me.

Today is the day I quit worrying about what I don't have and start being grateful for all the wonderful things God has already given me.

I'll remember that to worry is just a waste of time because my faith in God and his Divine Plan ensures everything will be just fine.

And tonight, before I go to bed, I'll go outside and raise my eyes to the heavens. I will stand in awe at the beauty of the stars and the moon, and I will praise God for these magnificent treasures.

As the day ends and I lay my head down on my pillow, I will thank the Almighty for the best day of my life. And I will sleep the sleep of a contented child, excited with expectation because know tomorrow is going to be the best day of my life, ever!

Ben and Jerry

2010-07-17T05:30:00.000-07:00

Ben and Jerry the only two men in the world to fully understand women.

Wife Told You How To Do It

2010-07-16T05:21:00.000-07:00

If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you to do it?

Right Person

2010-07-16T01:13:00.000-07:00

They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck

Strong Woman

2010-07-15T05:02:00.000-07:00

It takes a strong woman to remain in a bad marriage, it takes a STRONGER woman to leave that marriage, even if it means losing everything but your kids.

Successful Woman

2010-07-14T05:15:00.000-07:00

A successful woman is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at her ..Keep throwing I'll continue to build my empire...

Computer Passwords

2010-07-13T05:46:00.000-07:00

Horny husband helping his wife type in a password for her computer typed in MYPENIS wife fell over laughing when it said not long enough.

Forgiveness

2010-07-13T01:34:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness is the economy of the heart... forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits.
Hannah More

Men Working

2010-07-12T17:38:00.000-07:00

SIGN ON SIDE OF THE ROAD READS: CAUTION Men at work - Seriously? Women work all the time but men need signs when they do it?? I guess they need the validation!

TGIF

2010-07-12T17:17:00.001-07:00

Says....TGIF.... Thank God I'm Female!

Being A Woman

2010-07-12T17:04:00.000-07:00

Being a female is a matter of birth. Being a woman is a matter of age. But being a lady... that's a matter of choice

Ouotes of Forgiveness

2010-07-12T07:31:00.001-07:00

Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.
Suzanne Somers

Quote Of The Day

2010-07-12T07:22:00.000-07:00

Quote of the Day

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.

Carol Burnett

Dance Like Nobody Is Watching

2010-07-12T07:16:00.000-07:00

Dance Like Nobody Is Watching by Crystal Carol.

We convince ourselves that life will be better after we get married, have a baby, then another. Then we are frustrated that the kids aren't old enough and we'll be more content when they are. After that we're frustrated that we have teenagers to deal with. We will certainly be happy when they are out of that stage. We tell ourselves that our life will be complete when our spouse gets his or her act together, when we get a nicer car, are able to go on a nice vacation, when we retire.

The truth is, there's no better time to be happy than right now. If not now, when?

Your life will always be filled with challenges. It's best to admit this to yourself and decide to be happy anyway. Alfred D Souza said, "For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life."

This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. So, treasure every moment that you have. And treasure it more because you shared it with someone special, special enough to spend your time ... and remember that time waits for no one...

So stop waiting until you finish school, until you go back to school, until you lose ten pounds, until you gain ten pounds, until you have kids, until your kids leave the house, until you start work, until you retire, until you get married, until you get divorced, until Friday night, until Sunday morning, until you get a new car or home, until your car or home is paid off, until spring, until summer, until fall, until winter, until you are off welfare, until the first or fifteenth, until your song comes on, until you've had a drink, until you've sobered up, until you die, until you are born again to decide that there is no better time than right now to be happy...

Happiness is a journey, not a destination.

Thought for the day :
Work like you don't need money,
Love like you've never been hurt,
And dance like no one's watching.

Forgiveness Quotes

2010-07-11T07:32:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness is a funny thing, it warms the hearts and cools the sting.
Peter Allen

Good Stuff About Divorce

2010-07-11T03:34:00.000-07:00

Good Stuff About Divorce

Could there possibly be anything good about this whole dreary divorce business? Well, uh, yeah. Herewith,

You can eat onions and even garlic anytime you want.
No one griping about pulling over to ask directions when you're lost.
You don't have to be nice to your mother-in-law any more.
You can sleep on either side of the bed.
You can take hours to decide what to wear, just like when you were a teenager, and nobody will mind or call you crazy or indecisive or neurotic.
You don't have to make up the bed.
You can buy something nice for yourself, and no "guilt offering" for anybody else.
No more trying to get the "skid marks" out of his underwear.
No more arguing - "Chinese!" -- "Pizza!" -- "Chinese!" -- "Pizza!"
You can go to the movies any time you want, or you can just stay home and eat ice cream.
No more pee splashes around the toilet.
You can throw a divorce party.
No more arguing about Conan the Barbarian vs. Steel Magnolias.
I can display my Jon Bon Jovi pictures once again on my fridge.
I can buy as many pairs of shoes as I want.
You can change the goofy name of the cat.
No more feeling like a child being controlled by her father.
I don't have to go around the house picking up his garbage anymore!
I can bounce on my indoor mini trampoline whenever I want. It sounds like a squeaky bed and I don’t have to deal with the conflicting complaints of ‘too much noise’ and ‘my God, did you eat all that ice cream’!!!
You can fall asleep on the couch with the TV on and not get yelled at to "Just go to bed!"
No more unanswerable "Do I look fat in this?" questions.
No more listening to his three favorite words: "me," "mine," and "no."
I can enjoy the companionship of all the wild animals I want to in my home, and they're so much easier to clean up after than the X.
Nobody is telling you to come to bed when you don't want to be in bed with them. It's not like we were going to have sex!
No more feeling guilty when his plans don't fit in with what I want to do.
No more apologizing for thinking of me and my needs before him and his needs.
I decide my daughter's punishment when she eats chocolate cake for dinner.
My daughter decides my punishment when I eat vanilla ice cream for breakfast.
No more insults about my spirituality or how I choose to worship.
No more where have you been, where are you now, who are you with, and why aren't you home yet.
Leave the lid down if you want to.
No more watching him pick his nose.
You don't have to hide your Milano cookies any more.
Nobody glaring at you for being online for more than, say five hours.
KNOWING that if you left 2 cans of tuna in the shelf...they'll still be there, by golly!
You don't have to live the rest of your life having sex with your ex and no one else. You can do it whenever you want, with whomever you want, however you want, or not do it at all, and it's nobody's business but your own!
If you want cereal for supper, you eat cereal for supper.
I can get rid of all those items we had to keep out in case his family came by.
I can give those same items as gifts to the people I like the least.
No more sleeping on the couch because the snoring is so loud.
You get to read the newspaper first, all in neat little sections.
No more put-downs! (nobody's perfect)
I can eat Goo-Goo Clusters in any room in the house, not just in the bathroom.
I don't need the plunger any more.
No more yelling because he's going deaf and won't admit it.
Nobody but you messes with the checking account.
Save money on anniversary cards.
No more humming during sex so he'll think you're moaning.
No more razor stubble in the sink.
If something breaks, I fix it. I don't have to wait around for somebody else to decide that it's broken.
Go ahead and hang your underwear on the lampshade.
No more "straightened" rooms- and all your things put in bizarre places where you'll never find them.
Rearrange the furniture.
You can live more simply.
You can drink out of the milk carton with a clear conscience.
The knowledge that the statement : "Sorry, I am out with a friend right now, can I call you tomorrow?" will eat at his gut 'til it's gone, regardless whether you are just at the grocery store alone or at a party with a zillion friends. He will know you have moved on and it will bug him to pieces!!
You can experiment with all those weird vegetarian recipes you've always been meaning to try.
No more weird changes on the computer.
You can upgrade to that 120-gig hard drive without adding anything to the Waterford crystal.
You can embrace loneliness.
You can use all the drawers. Yes, all of them.
Ditto the closet and the garage.
Plenty of hot water, and no wait for the shower.
You don't have to listen to stupid music.
You can actually USE the grill instead of waiting for him to get up and cook something.
You can listen to all the stupid music you want to.
Sole custody of the TV remote.
Can flagrantly use potpourri, fragrances, flowers, and perfumes without dealing with those gagging noises coming from the depths of the recliner chair.
Sole custody of the recliner chair!
Nobody (including you) complains about the thermostat setting. You can keep the house as cold (or as warm) as you want.
His smelly-holey boxers are gone. Gone!
You can hang the Nerf basketball hoop on the door of the living room.
Nobody expects you to be thinking clearly, so you can flake out and get away with it.
Good time to get braces.
I can find somebody better!

I have to pull these out for special attention, because they came in within 48 hours of each other!

No more farts in bed.
I can fart in bed anytime I want to.

Survive Divorce

2010-07-10T15:46:00.001-07:00

You Can Survive Divorce

The first thing you need to do is to take a deep breath. Of course you're panicked. Of course you believe that the world is crashing in around you. That's what you're supposed to be feeling. The fact is, though, that you're very likely to get through this okay.

Think about it. Last year in the U.S. alone, there were more than one million divorces. That's two million people who have gone through this recently and and have lived to tell about it. They got through it. So can you.

Now take another deep breath. See? You'll make it okay, friend. Now let's get started.

Read some of the information on Cutting Through the Crud. There's lots of information there about the divorce process and about how you and your spouse can get through it without killing each other.

As you get more knowledgeable about the Crud, you'll begin gathering information about the main issues of your divorce. This will include your property division, what arrangements to make for your children if you have them, and what sort of child support or alimony is appropriate in your case. And after (but only after) you have some basic information under your belt, you can begin thinking about what kind of professional help you're going to need.

Divorce stinks - there's no question about that. Your challenge is to get through it, one step at a time. You're going to make it. Really.

Life After Divorce

2010-07-09T15:39:00.000-07:00

How Will You Live After Divorce?

One of the many challenges that makes divorce so complicated is that even while you're dealing with all the crud of the divorce process itself, you must be thinking about how you will get on with a new life for yourself and your children after divorce.

This includes your parenting plan, if you have children. And also if you have children, you've probably already started thinking about child support, whether you're going to be paying it or receiving it. It also includes figuring out what role alimony is going to play, establishing credit for yourself as a single person, and changing your role socially.

There's a handy checklist here on Divorceinfo.com for you to use after your divorce. Click here to see it.

One of the first things I recommend you do, if you haven't already done so, is to think through your budget. If you're like most people emerging from your divorce, you'll realize that what you're planning to spend is more than what you're planning to have coming in. It's painful, but you'll probably have to make some changes in the way you live, at least for the next year or two. The sooner you realize what changes are in store, the less painful those changes will be.

For women, you'll probably need to think through some of the Guy Stuff he's been doing.

After you're finished with your divorce (or maybe even while you're finishing), you may want to check out Divorce Wrap-up to begin moving on with your life. For most of us, that includes a new will. And you may even be ready to think about Dating After Divorce.

If you and your spouse are cooperative (or if money is really tight), you may be considering living together even after your divorce is effective. You may even be thinking about remarrying.

Domestic Violence

2010-05-11T14:31:00.000-07:00

While you SCREAM at your woman, there's a
man wishing he could whisper softly in her ear... While you HUMILIATE,
OFFEND and INSULT her, there's a man flirting with her and reminding her
how wonderful she is. While you HURT your woman, there's a man wishing
he could make love to her. While you make your women CRY there's a man
stealing smiles from her... Please RE Post this if you're against
Domestic Violence

Re Commit

2010-04-11T01:23:00.000-07:00

If we fall, we don't need self-recrimination or blame or anger - we need a reawakening of our intention and a willingness to re-commit, to be whole-hearted once again

Quote of the Day

2010-04-10T07:36:00.000-07:00

Quote of the Day

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; Some blunders and absurdities have crept in. Forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. You shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered by your old nonsense.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Strong Postive Attitude

2010-04-10T06:17:00.001-07:00

Strong Postive Attitude
A strong positive attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug.

Perseverance

2010-04-10T05:44:00.001-07:00

Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another... Walter Elliott

There is Life After Divorce

2010-04-01T07:42:00.000-07:00

There is Life After Divorce
by Fran Watson

A married woman becomes a single woman for one of two reasons: death or divorce. The former is an honourable state, the latter is not.

When a woman loses her husband to death the neighbours all rally round and provide meals and any help they can give with regard to household repairs or cleaning or anything that is needed. They are willing to provide comfort and a shoulder to cry on. They are available for the widow and they include her in their activities, feeling sorry for her that she is now so alone.

However, things are quite different when a marriage ends due to infidelity or marital breakdown. That immediately plunges a woman into a new category. She is transformed, instantaneously it seems,from a married woman to a divorcee. Becoming one of many, part of a group of used and discarded women, seen as suspect by all those who are still safely ensconced in the womb of their marriage.

People tend to withdraw from her. Invitations to get togethers cease. It appears that women think their husbands might be attracted to the idea of an “available woman” and so the women who used to be friends withdraw and leave her alone with her tears and her fears. There are no meals prepared and no offers of help. Husbands are kept at home just in case, for such is the image portrayed of a divorcee. The husbands might not be safe. She might cause the destruction of other marriages.

We read jokes all the time about the lonely divorcee who invites the mailman, the milkman, or the Maytag repairman into her home with the intent of seducing him. (A joke made up, I am sure, by a man who has never known the humiliation and pain of being a divorcee.) Perhaps she even seduces them one right after the other, for such is the life of the “gay divorcee”, isn’t it? Freed from the bonds of marriage, with unmet needs and desires, divorcees are wanting to fill the void; or at least that is the popular image. And so in place of invitations to parties or neighbourhood barbeques which were formerly were issued to the couple and their family, there is an empty mailbox, and the phone stays quiet. She checks it every now and then to make sure it is still working.

The divorcee begins to feel as though she no longer exists; as if, because she is no longer half of a relationship, she ceases to be a part of the neighbourhood. Women who used to call her friend no longer call. Her children are not invited to play with the neighbours’ children. Perhaps the women feel they would be contaminated by the disease of divorce, as if it were a virus that could be caught, or maybe they just don’t know how to talk to a newly divorced woman. A divorced man, on the other hand, is often seen as more eligible and is a welcome addition to many parties. His social life may increase, and because he usually does not have the children, his disposable income is often enough to keep him comfortably.

However, life goes on. The bills still have to be paid, the kids still have to be fed and they have to be clothed. Family chores that were done by two are now done by one. If the children are old enough, they can chip in and help with the household duties such as dishes and meal preparation and housecleaning. Because of the reduction in income, the divorcee is often forced to seek employment and then she has two jobs; one inside and one outside the home.

Sometimes the inside life doesn’t change much. For those who had husbands who simply went to work and came home at night expecting to be waited on, their workload is reduced by one person, so this can be a blessing. But the availability of a backup when she is really tired and the kids are really obnoxious is a problem. She has to deal with all the problems, tired or not.

Because she has been ostracized by her neighbours she seeks out other divorcees for companionship, often building relationships and forming deep bonds that last for years as they share the day to day problems and achievements. They get together with their kids and pool their resources for family dinners. They support each other in job searches, in the handling of problems, in the fights with their exes. They listen to each other and care for each other’s children.

Sometimes, because of the great reduction in income, divorcees are forced to apply for an allowance from the provincial government. This is known as welfare or Mother’s Allowance. There they are told that they have no right to have a phone or a car, or any of the things they consider necessities but the government considers luxuries, such as a heating bill over the allotted amount. Widows, on the other hand, usually receive a pension from their husband’s estate which they can spend however they want, with no rules. The divorcees are told to sell the car and get rid of the phone, even if they are out in the country. If they have a house, they might have to give it up and move the children to a new area. Sometimes, in order to survive, they may use credit cards to buy the things they feel they need for their kids for school and other activities. They may not be able to send their kids on school trips or buy the clothes that the kids need to fit in and so their kids may be ridiculed because of the way they dress. When the kids come home crying, they often feel guilty and wonder if they couldn’t have worked things out better with their ex-husbands. They cry but try to hide the tears from their children, not wanting to upset them.

When the divorcee ventures into the realms of the full-time employee instead of part-time, she must find a babysitter for her kids, arrange everyone’s schedule and settle into her new lifestyle. She tries to find a boss who is willing to let her attend the various special events at her children’s school and cries silently to herself when she is unable to attend a day graduation due to work, or when she is unable to see her children receive sports awards, but she knows that she is doing the best she can. She attends what she can in the evenings and on weekends and hopes it is enough.

As the divorcee settles into life on her own, she may begin to find advantages such as being able to go where she wants, when she wants and with whom she wants. She has only to consider herself, and her kids, if she has any. Eventually the heartaches will ease a little and the divorcee will reach out to others a little more, perhaps even being willing to take the risk of dating another man.

Her circumstances may not have changed a lot. She still struggles to pay bills, to provide for her kids, yet she finds her life is full. Not the rumoured life of the gay divorcee, replete with men or with parties and wild living, but one of love for her kids, and perhaps of studying for a degree while working in a fulfilling career where helping others. She has weathered the storms of life and feels that she has come out on top. Her children move on to their own homes and to employment. Perhaps her eldest has his dream job, that of webmaster and service technician. Another may become the youngest Inventory Control Manager and the only female one in Eastern Ontario for a large soft drink company. Another, with a child of her own, may work part-time and plan to return to school to take an Esthetics course. Her children could be very involved in hockey, perhaps playing at the AA level or Junior A level which requires a lot of travelling and sacrifice of personal time. But to her it is all worth it to watch her child score the winning goal and to see the smile on his face as he turns from the net. Her heart swells with pride as his teammates congratulate him and the parents lean over to say how well he played.

Yes, life continues after divorce, the pain and heartache suffered in the beginning eventually fade somewhat and the divorcee finds the strength to survive and, more than that, to move on to whatever the future has in store.

For more poetry and stories you can go to Fran's webpage http://www.franwatson.ca

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Fran_Watson

Does Legal Separation Always End in Divorce?

2010-03-20T07:41:00.000-07:00

Legal Separation is a legal procedure that allows married couples to spend time apart for a variety of reasons as two separate or single people while retaining the legal status of their marriage.

We will first look at some of the advantages of separating over divorce or even annulment. Legal separation is to get a district court order (in the USA) stating the responsibilities both partners have towards each other and the rights they are entitled to enjoy as they live apart. This order is initiated though a petition to the court and the notice is served on the other partner. The court that issues the order has in its power, to solve all the normal problems that are settled in divorce court. So in effect, a situation is created where the two can remain as if divorced, while maintaining their marriage in the legal books.

The first advantage is that since they are still married, one spouse will be covered by the insurance of the other. They will also enjoy social security and pension and such benefits available that are the privilege of married couples. Secondly, though marriage seemed to have lost the sanctity that it had say 50 years ago and divorce rates are much, much higher, followers of certain sects of faith still avoid divorce. However, rather than stay in the confines of what would probably be a difficult situation they can use a legal separation.

In the event of some irrevocable rift in the relationship, couples sometimes seek to divorce quickly. However, the laws of certain states in the USA and the laws of some countries require that the couple be separated from each other for sometime, before they go about unraveling their marriage legally. For couples that are in a hurry to extract themselves from each other, legal separation allows a much quicker alternative. Also couples can use it as a trial, or as an opportunity to spend sometime away from each other and take look at their lives. During this period of trial, the court allows the separation of property and even childcare is allocated to each parents. The drawback some parties find with the legal separation is that, many judges will award the final settlements in divorce cases, based on what was agreed at the time of parting. This probably will be a good point form the wealthier partners view as he or she can get an idea of how much the divorce will cost. However, should you find someone else you wish to enter into marriage with, you would have to pay visit to the divorce courts, as you are still legal married.

On the positive side, legal separation has resulted in people actually saving their marriages, as the time apart had allowed them to look objectively at the situation, work out how to improve their relationship and probably in some cases when one partner thought staying married might be less costly, though it may be cynical to say so.

It could be said that legal separation do not always end in divorce, however not all partners that do not end up divorced are reconciled either.

Christine Crotts enjoys listening to her music or the local talk shows while working in the kitchen. Christine has written a site containing reviews on table radios, as well as the Bose radios.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_Crotts

Understanding Spousal Support

2010-03-10T07:39:00.000-08:00

Spousal Support or alimony as it is known in some parts, is a periodic payment, usually monthly, that was either agreed to by the two individuals or determined by the divorce court and paid by one party, the 'Payor' to the other, the 'Recipient'. Normally the wealthier party is expected to pay this and traditionally it has been the 'husband' making monthly payments to the 'wife'.

The origin of spousal support can be traced back at least to the 17th century in England. In those days when a husband acquired the wife's property on marriage, alimony ensured that the woman had an income in the event of divorce. The awarding of monthly financial support ensured that a wife was not punished or made to suffer through the actions of husband that led to the break up of the marriage. This was to ensure that a husband who could afford to pay and maintain the wife, would not go out and commit an act to instigate a divorce, just so the he could avoid supporting the wife. However with the legal proceedings no longer been biased in gender, even males now receive spousal support.

Spousal support is separate form child support and only includes the money for the ex spouse. It aims to ensure that the recipient continues to partake of the Payor's wealth or earning capacity accumulated during the period of marriage. There are several considerations taken into account when alimony is calculated. These may change according to the place where the divorce proceedings were initiated. The length of marriage is a very important aspect and some counties limit the payment to a time period that is less than that of the marriage. Also the gender and the age at the time of separation are considered with women and older recipients getting a better alimony settlement from the courts. An important consideration is approximating the fault that led to the separation. In the event of the blame lying with the intended recipient, courts can refrain from awarding spousal support.

Spousal support awarded through courts can either be 'Rehabilitation support' where the money will fund either an opportunity to obtain professional skills or academic qualifications. Reorientation support is awarded when spouse can show that the property division does not meet with his or her requirements.

It may be of interest to some that there is instigation to get the laws regarding spousal support to reflect the times and get more up to date and in some parts there have been recent changes to the law. Courts try to ensure that the former spouse is able to live in a life style that was similar to what they experienced as a married person. At the same time now share the view that an adult is expected to be able to look after his or her own needs. The idea is to make the laws more clear and that couples can be aware of what they need to pay and are entitled to without a lengthy court case, that are built up on complex legal points.

Christine Crotts likes to play spy games with her young sons. This involves sneaking around, trying to catch the others without being seen. Christine has written a site containing reviews on walkie talkie radio, as well as the waterproof walkie talkie.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Christine_Crotts

Successful Woman

2010-02-08T08:17:00.000-08:00

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
Lana Turner

Hello God

2009-12-13T15:04:00.000-08:00

The holidays can be stressful in their own way. Add in a divorce, recession, separation, single parents, depression, homeless, and other medical conditions. We sit some days and worry where will the next meal come from or how can I pay for my electric bill. Many single moms worry about Christmas and making the time just a little bit brighter for their children.

I came across this prayer today thought many women could use a little talk with the man upstairs.Enjoy, keep those special people in your heart while you pray along with them.

"Hello God, I called tonight
To talk a little while
I need a friend who'll listen
To my anxiety and trial.
You see, I can't quite make it
Through a day just on my own...
I need your love to guide me,
So I'll feel alone.
I want to ask you please to keep,
My family safe and sound.
Come and fill their lives with confidence
For whatever fate they've bound.
Give me the faith, dear God to face
Each hour throughout the day,
And not to worry over things
I can't change in any way,
I thank you God, for being home
And listening to my call,
For giving me such good advice
When I Stumble and fall.
Your number, God is the only one
That answers every time.
I never get a busy signal,
And never pay a dime.
So thank you, God for listening
To my troubles and my sorrow.
Good Night, God I love you, too.
And I'll call again tomorrow!"

Unknown author.

Quotes of the Day

2009-12-10T15:29:00.000-08:00

The return on giving.

Make Yourself Necessary to Somebody- Ralph Waldo Enerson

Jigsaw Puzzle

2009-12-01T15:32:00.000-08:00

Are you a jigsaw aficionado?

If you have worked complicated jigsaw puzzles,you know three things them:

First, They take time. Few people can put several hundred pieces of a puzzle together rapidly. Most large and complex puzzles take several days,even weeks, to complete. The fun is in the process, the satisfaction in the accomplishment.

Second, the staring point of a puzzle is usually to identify the corners and edges, the pieces with a straight edge.

Third, jigsaw puzzles are fun to work by oneself, but even more fun to work with others. When a "fit" is discovered between two or more pieces, the excitement is felt by all the participants.

Consider the day ahead of you like a piece in the jigsaw puzzle of your life. Indeed, its shape is likely to be just as jagged, its colors just as unidentifiable. The meaning of today may not be sequential to that of yesterday. What you experience today may actually fit with something you experienced several months ago, or something you experienced several months ago, or something you will experience in the future. You aren't likely to see the big picture of your life by observing only one day. Even so, you can trust that there is a plan and purpose. All the pieces will come together according to God's design and timetable.

On some days, we find straight-edged pieces of our life's puzzle-truths that become a part of our reason for being. On other days, we find pieces that fit together so we understand more about ourselves and about God's work in our lives, with others and inviting them to be part of the process of discovering who er are.

The main thing to remember is to enjoy the process. Live today to the fullest, knowing one day you'll see the full picture.

Life is what we make it. Always has been, always will be.- Grandma Moses

Holidays, No Time for A Self Pity Party

2009-11-17T09:18:00.000-08:00

Ladies. the holidays are approaching fast. This time of year can be stressful. It is easy to fall into a ruit and have a self pity party. Please, please have plans. Do not sit at home all day and all alone. Due to divorce this may be the year your children are with your former spouse. So grad yourself by the boot straps and make plans. There are many things you can do to raise your self esteem and self worth.

Here are few ideas or things to do this holiday season.

1. Attend a local food self or kitchens and help serve meals to the homeless etc.

2. Call your best friend and ask if she needs help with her dinner. Being around friends is great and you can never have enough positive people in your life.

3.If you have family close by go to their house. Think of the dollars you would have spent to have a meal at your home and use that for gas money to see your family.

4.Attend a movie. There are so many new movies out and when you attend an afternoon showing is much cheaper than evenings.

5. See what your local church has planned and attend or help with their functions.

As you can see there are many things you can do this holiday season. For myself this year I am going to take the money I would have spent on a Thanksgiving meal and travel to Iowa to see family and friends. Then for Thanksgiving I have a friend who will travel with me and drive to Illinois to my fathers for the holiday weekend.

I feel very good that I took charge and made thiese plans so I am not just sitting around the house doing nothing. Being with friends many times around the holidays are the best medicine a doctor could order.

Enjoy yourself and enjoy your life.

Good God Girl What Are You Thinking

2009-11-02T05:06:00.000-08:00

There are people who have good hearts. They are always looking to be helpful and do the right thing. Then there are the people who prey and take advantage of these good people. Many ex husbands do that with their ex wives or vice versa.

I soon learned this past week.. Our daughter just had her 3rd child. While the ex planned on attending and our daughter and older grand kids wanted him there as well. I was grandma taxi. I had to run and pick him up run him many places and my daughter these past few weeks. I had to run for him to work and picking him up for a ride home etc.

Don't get me wrong it was a christian thing to do. However, not once did he pay for gas.I learned last week he used my name and SS number to get Dish TV at his home. Tomorrow I will be meeting with him along with my attorney and his to discuss this item. He wants to have my spouse support reduced. Unreal!!

Here is a man I supported for over 30 years of marriage worked 2 full time jobs at times while he would work only 1 day or not per week.

When I got sick 2 years ago he decided I was of no value to him. The physical abuse and mental abuse increased to the highest level. He currently grosses close to 55K per year and I 20K on SSDI. His spouse support is 500.00 per month which makes my income 26K per year less than 50% of his.

He complains he is unable to live on his income due to the amount of spouse support he pays me. Then he goes and puts his utilities in my name or our daughters name without either of our permissions. Now, I have learned there is a difference between a person needs and wants. I have been very frugal. This is a man that smokes and drinks heavily in fact his is an alcoholic.

Basic math shows the amount he spends on cigarettes,vodka and soda more than covers my 500.00 per month. ( 1.5 pack per day @ $5.00 = $225.00 month. A huge 2 liter bottle of vodka per 1 to 1.5 days @ $17.00 per bottle = aprox $400.00+ per month. Then add in the soda needed to mix with the vodka 2+ liter bottle of Pepsi per day @ $1.50 = $45.00 per month. Totalling just these 3 items $225.00 Cigarettes + $400.00 Vodka + $45.00 Pepsi = $670.00+ per month. Which is more than enough to cover my spouse support.

He gets an annual pay increases from his federal contracted job. The next 2 years I will not receive any increases. The only increase will be in expenses. My medical insurance alone costs over $400.00 per month. He reminds me of a parent who refuses to pay child support for their children.

It tells you alot about a person. This person who took vows for better or worse sickness and health. Who enjoyed all the benefits for 30 years my income provided and supported him and our family. Now when the table is turned and my income went down 75% I was of no value to him. In fact he pointed this out verbally on many occasions that I was worthless to him.

I can say since the separation and divorce of 2 years I am much happier. People tell me all the time they can see it in my face and I am looking great. I must agree! I feel GREAT! There is physical pain each day due to my medical history, but that is small when looking at the emotional and physical pain I was living with while being married.

Looking back.... I say "Good God Girl What Are You Thinking". I knew I could not fix a broken marriage however I knew I could work and take care of myself. People would say how can you do it all? Then the ones closest to me would say they could see breakdown coming and so glad I woke up.

They would say:
"Good God Girl What Are You Thinking."
"Get Out"
"You Know What You Can Do About It."
"When You Are Ready I Will Still Be Your Friend"

Yes, it has taken 2 years to recover from the divorce to a abusive, alcoholic and unfaithful spouse with a hidden life style. While at the same time fighting breast cancer having a double mastectomy with reconstruction. Emotionally and physically I am a better person and I even love myself.

Each time I happen to be in the same room either at a family function etc. I chuckle inside I can see he is so negative and very good at malupation. Of course this is what an addicate does. Each time I get smarter and now being removed from all of it the air is much clearer.

There is not a day without physical muscle pain. Each day I look in the mirror I see the scars from when they cut into my body. But they never cut into my soul. Melissa Etheridge says it correctly "I Run For Life" The physical and mental scars are fading away. The darkness can be anything in your lives including divorce, death, breast cancer, and more.

Melissa Etheridge - I Run For Life:
Melissa Etheridge Lyrics I Run For Life
Lyrics Artist: Melissa Etheridge
Song: I Run For Life
Album: Greatest Hits The Road Less Traveled 2005

It's been years since they told her about it
The darkness her body possessed
And the scars are still there in the mirror
Everyday that she gets herself dressed
Though the pain is miles and miles behind her
And the fear is now a docile beast
If you ask her why she is still running
She'll tell you it makes her complete

[Chorus:]
I run for hope
I run to feel
I run for the truth
For all that is real
I run for your mother your sister your wife
I run for you and me my friend I run for life

It's a blur since they told me about it
How the darkness had taken its toll
And they cut into my skin and they cut into my body
But they will never get a piece of my soul
And now I'm still learning the lesson
To waken when I hear the call
And if you ask me why I am still running
I'll tell you I run for us all

[Chorus]

And someday if they tell you about it
If the darkness knocks on your door
Remember her remember me
We will be running as we have before
Running for answers
Running for more

You Are Kidding Me

2009-10-14T15:28:00.000-07:00

A crisis may change your life. But it doesn't have to ruin it.

Love.

2009-10-05T16:06:00.000-07:00

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.'”

Quote For The Day

2009-10-03T17:03:00.000-07:00

A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.

Love Is

2009-10-01T16:11:00.000-07:00

“I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.”

Happiness

2009-09-25T01:54:00.000-07:00

People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost.

Life and Happiness

2009-09-24T01:42:00.000-07:00

Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 percent of all your happiness or misery.

Love

2009-09-23T17:58:00.000-07:00

Forgiveness is the final form of love.

Quote of the Day

2009-09-23T08:41:00.001-07:00

Love is when the other person's happiness is more important than your own.

Life

2009-08-20T07:48:00.001-07:00

Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly!
Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably
And never regret anything that made you smile!

Maxine and Dirty Dishes

2009-08-12T10:59:00.000-07:00

Dishes and Dishwashers.

Quotes For The Day

2009-08-12T08:34:00.001-07:00

Giving up doesn't always mean you are weak. Sometimes it means that you are strong enough to let go."

Loved

2009-08-11T10:17:00.001-07:00

"I'm Accepted, I'm Blessed, I'm Loved by the Best!"

Post Divorce - Recognizing and Dealing With Untrue Accusations

2009-07-17T05:12:00.000-07:00

Shelley Grieser - I am a Christian Life Coach specializing in Broken Marriages/Divorce. I work with people all across the country who are on their journey of recovery from divorce, to empower them to create a future they truly desire.

Going through a divorce is extremely painful. As I walk alongside a good friend of mine who is currently going through a divorce, I am reminded of the additional pain often experienced by hurtful words spoken or exchanged between spouses.

Amazing isn't it when you are on the outside of the situation you can see it so clearly. But when you are in the middle of the situation, on the receiving end of the hurtful words, you can find yourself deeply offended, even when you know the accusations are not true.

For example, my friend's husband has told her on more than one occasion that she is "a worthless human being." My friend is far from worthless. She is a very kind, caring and giving person. Also, she is a hard worker who has helped me with numerous projects around my home through the years. My friend knows she is not a worthless human being, yet to have her husband say that to her is heart breaking.

If you have been through a divorce, maybe you discovered that spouses can say some pretty mean things. For some people, if you reflect back you may realize your spouse had developed a habit of putting you down, with negative, demeaning comments. Over time you can easily start to believe the things that are said to you or about you, even when they are not true

I will never forget during my divorce when my husband and I were meeting with the mediator for our children. We were discussing one of the details for our parenting agreement and my soon to be ex-husband made some demeaning, derogatory comment to me. The mediator very sternly let him know that he was out of line and not to speak to me in that manner. She told him he was being disrespectful and his behavior was unacceptable.

For me, that was a real wake up call. I remember thinking to myself, "Wow! Maybe it's not just me. Someone else believes the way he treats me is disrespectful and unacceptable." It gave me a sense of validation for my feelings.

Since that day, my ex-husband continues to make belittling, critical comments to me in emails and/or in person. Although we have a fairly amicable relationship, the negative comments are still made. I am happy to say that after years of being treated this way, I have learned to brush it off more quickly.

If you experienced damaging, hurtful comments in your marriage, during your divorce or in your present relationship with your former spouse, are you aware of the false accusations? You may be so use to hearing them that you accept them as truth. Recognizing the lies and determining the truth may require help. You may want to speak with a good counselor, therapist, coach or trusted friend to help you sort through the comments made by your former spouse.

Here are a few suggestions for combating false accusations:

Recognize the untrue messages as false accusations.

Don't believe them. Don't allow your former spouse to push your buttons. When the words no longer elicit a response from you, they lose their power.

Replace the lie with a statement of truth. For example let's take my friend's situation. The next time her soon to be ex husband tells her she is a worthless human being, she can stop and say to herself; I am a worthwhile and valuable person. My friends and family love me and care about me.

Be patient with yourself. Realize it can take time to reprogram your response.

Don't take it personally. Understand if your former spouse feels guilty, jealous, angry or insecure about themselves they may speak critically of you to make themselves feel better.

Don't retaliate with the same behavior. Do not repay evil for evil.

If you need to vent, talk to a trusted friend. It is nice to have an understanding friend(s) that will listen to you and let you vent or talk through a situation when needed.

Make the decision to no longer believe the lies. It really does not matter what your former spouse thinks of you or says about you. I know hearing the words can be extremely hurtful and painful. Yet, you know the truth. Be the bigger person and do not partake in the verbal mudslinging.

Copyright 2009 Shelley Grieser All Rights Reserved.

Do you dread communicating with your former spouse? Do you cringe every time you have to be in their presence, fearing what snide remark they will throw your way? Do you wonder how you will survive the next number of years having to communicate with your former spouse? If you are interested in reading more about divorce recovery, transitioning from married to single, and rebuilding your life after divorce, then please visit me at: http://www.ahopefilledfuture.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Shelley_Grieser

1st Wives Club - Post Divorce

Ex Husbands What Are They Good For

2009-07-16T04:58:00.000-07:00

Ex-Husbands - What Are They Good For? Absolutely Everything! By Connie Ragen Green

Connie Ragen Green will teach you how to write articles, blog posts, and eBooks to increase your web presence and build an online business.

After a divorce both the man and the woman are usually angry, hurt, and disappointed. They feel that the other person wasted their time and is not good for anything anymore. They just want to be out of each others lives. It doesn’t have to be that way. If you can get past what caused the marriage to fail you may see that the other person is a trusted confidant and good for absolutely everything.

My ex-husband is a wonderful man. We made every attempt to work together as a couple but finally we both realized that we were too far apart on important issues for us to stay together. We had an amicable divorce and went our separate ways. We had no children together but I remained close to his adult son and granddaughter. We would see each other on occasion and we both made sure that bank accounts, income taxes, and other matters were taken care of in a timely manner. I felt bad that I had been unable to make this relationship work but glad that we were still civil to each other.

About three years later I was injured at work. I was incapacitated for several months and needed help with shopping, errands, and my dogs. It was my ex who offered to help me during this time and I truly appreciated it. By then we were not angry any longer and had both moved on emotionally. We were able to enjoy each other as friends. I trusted him with my finances and knew that he would take good care of the dogs. He was purchasing a truck for his business and I was able to offer him some helpful advice. We had moved past the divorce and into a new phase for our relationship.

Many people I know think that it is strange to remain friends with someone you were once married to. Others think it shows great maturity. We are not concerned with what anyone else thinks. We just know that it is good to have a trusted, special friend in your life. Part of it feels good because we both see that we are good people, just not good together as husband and wife. If you have the opportunity to stay friends with your ex I would highly recommend it.

Connie Ragen Green is a speaker and author living in southern California. Visit her at http://www.SmallBusinessUnMarketing.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Connie_Ragen_Green

1st Wives Club - Ex-Husbands

Scorned Spouses - Ex-Wives Club

2009-07-15T04:44:00.000-07:00

Scorned spouses get revenge in "Ex-Wives Club"
By Barry Garron Reuters

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) - Been abused by your ex? Cheated on? Belittled and marginalized? Then pull up a chair because "Ex-Wives Club" is for you, you and you.

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